Feel so bad!

haiz. veri veri sad. i make spoilt my cousin cloth!!! dat day my cousin lend me cloth to wear den i think i don noe make wat la, den accidentally bleach the cloth, i tink. and the cloth is from his gf! veri sad case... don noe how to say sorrie too. feel so bad, like he lend me his most precious thing den i make spoilt, haiz! Den, i oso don noe why, 撞到my bro face... so clumsy. these few days like not 清醒, keep doing things that i shldnt do.

Realli cant get over it. hate myself being veri emotional sometimes. like will need a lot of time to get over someting... Always like 跟着感觉走… no control of anything, jus do wat i feel like doing. which is realli bad.

this is how i tink my life is like rite now... jus expressing feelings. (wrote this on bus, i tink)

莫名的伤感　无奈的狼狈
我变了…　　现在的我　
少了点快乐　多了点犹豫
少了点规律　多了点彷徨
少了点自由　多了份不自在
也许只有陶醉在音乐里
才能放下一切　忘记所有…

aniwae today got the camp, den ask us to set our goals. okie la, this year may seem veri useless to me cos i havent set wat goals i want to achieve this year.

My Goals for 2005: (though may seem quite toopid and slow to wait till now den set, haha...)

1. to be able to go j2 with a good results [A, B, C, B4] (possible?)
2. to pass Grade 8 Piano Theory
3. to be a good president (i hope i realli can)
4. to write a nice nice classical song and a chinese pop song
5. to be able to control my emotions better
6. to be richer and richer as days pass by (don tink i am money-minded, money is impt)
7. to be able to sing the song "i turn to you" well in 2 versions (one in concert pitch, one in a lower octave)
8. to have more freedom in many ways
9. to be happy everyday (impossible, i tink about too many sad tings)
10. to make this world filled with endless love (100% chopped impossible cos ppl now are realistic)

Aniwae, from audrey and michelyn, heard that stanley say me veri lan or someting!!! so fed up. i havent like do anyting or start work den he start to say things le. 人不可冒相, to tink he is such a person! toopid! ~_~''' Angri!

now i am like veri 闷 cos i bon the camp and now sitting comfortably in the com lab typing this. slacker, cant stand it! haiz. no hope again.

jus hope that this week will be a pleasant week. (last week was quite a ok wan, i tink).

若能倒回时间，就不会犯错吗？
我讨厌犯错，因为即使得到别人的原谅，自己却原谅不了自己……